‘Battle of Los Angeles’ Syfy TV Movie Review

by on March 13, 2011

in Entertainment, tv reviews

'Battle of Los Angeles' Syfy MovieIn the obvious knock off titled Syfy Channel movie, Battle of Los Angeles went, I usually expect a certain amount of hokey fun, but this movie hit a new low I didn’t expect to ever see again.  I give the movie a 1 out of 10… 1 for the fact that it ended and it was so bad that I actually started to laugh near the end.

The rest of this review of this Syfy channel original movie is a take on the movie and some observations throughout.  There will be spoilers of a sort, but I’m thinking if you see this movie pop up on your TV, crank it up and change over to a Rock-Paper-Scissors tournament to save your mind.

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In Battle of Los Angeles opening a spaceship plows through and destroys a satellite.  We then tune into a digitally created bland looking F-16, with a monotone radio communication for them to check out the unknown radar contact coming down into the sky.

There ya go, a huge spaceship comes down out of the sky and hovers over Los Angeles.  And then, exactly like it happened in Independence Day, a beam comes down out of the ship through a skyscraper and the devastation spreads  throughout.  Then the F-16′s fire missiles but the UFO takes over the missiles and turns them on themselves, destroying those planes.

'Battle of Los Angeles' from asylum

A 2nd pilot instantly figures out that if they shoot from a closer range the UFO can’t take control, but then the missiles explode on an invisible force field that surrounds the hovering alien ship.

Then flying saucers drop from the hovering ship and start firing on everything in sight, despite the beam that started the devastation.

AH, here comes the scene from ID4 where a bunch of UFO’s come in over the desert to attack the military base.

Then a Corsair lands in the midst of all the carnage, the pilot looks confused (I think that’s the expression he’s trying to convey).  He took off in 1942 and went to investigate the UFO’s back then but landed now.  They seem to think this kid from ’42 is the key to it…  to something.

And this, was the first 20 minutes.

A little bit later the armed group of soldiers who we’re following encounters a woman who can do more with a sword than they can with hand grenades and machine guns.

Then there’s this scene that is very reminiscent of Cowboys and Aliens where a man shoots down a drone with a handgun and stands his ground as the thing crashes at his feet.

There’s a captured alien and they even ask if anyone has any Reese’s Pieces.  “The damn thing loves them.”

Another alien has acid spit and an android body.

One of the characters is a cross between Black Widow and Nick Fury, with a samurai sword.

Ah, a ship that’s programmed to 1 pilot and only 1 pilot…  as a character said, “You’ve seen Avatar, let’s go.”  (Oh yea, they’re flying an alien ship up to the mother ship hovering over L.A..)

Two folk get trapped in a trash compactor on the alien ship.

One of the aliens things is a morphing robot… ala Terminator.

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The dialog is about as flat as I’ve ever heard from any movie and the facial expressions of the actors is about as dead pan as I’ve ever seen.  But this is a quickie knock-off movie that would seem to be based on or around the premise that is delivered in the movie in theaters that came out yesterday, Battle: Los Angeles.

The CGI in Battle of Los Angeles takes a surprisingly huge step back from the movies that have come out in recent days/years on Syfy and the same can be said for the cinematography.  It was as if they rushed out and filmed this thing as fast as possible without hiring an editor and put it in the can, as is.

Even amongst Saturday night popcorn movies, this was about as flat as ever.  I stayed tuned in to see what else I could have fun bagging on, all for you guys.

I’m sorry Syfy, but as positive as I try to be, this latest movie stuns me in as much as how it can be called an “original movie.”  Huge, a huge plagiarist effort of writing peppered with Jr. High level product is not original.

As far as movies go, this has been one of the worst two hours I’ve ever sat through on TV.  I’ve created a new scale for this movie.  I’d give Battle of Los Angeles on the Syfy channel, a 5 or 6… as in 5 or 6 beers to get through it.

About 

I've been writing newsletters since 1999. Of late, I've been focusing on the entertainment consumer angle on mostly the sci-fi, fantasy and action genres of TV, movies and books.

{ 17 comments… read them below or add one }

Bbotu March 13, 2011 at 10:28 am

I agree wholeheartedly with your review of this Syfy disaster. But, unlike you, I waited and did manage to find one redeeming quality in the movie that looked like they had put some thought into it, and finally it came. The end credits. My wife (with blessings from a higher power) was fortunate enough to fall asleep half way through this ridiculous attempt at entertainment. I should have been so lucky. Earth vs Flying Saucers was 10 times the movie this was, and it was made in 1956. Syfy channel should be embarrassed for airing this.

Joe from Kalispell March 13, 2011 at 10:46 am

SyFy productions are getting crappier as the years go on. We need to push our federal representative to finish off the new law to let cable and satellite channels be done as “ala carte”. Yes it means marginal channels will die off cause they aren’t funded by basic cable subscriptions. In this case we can vote NO to SyFy with out pocketbook because nothing else will work.

Doug Glass March 13, 2011 at 12:59 pm

You’d be surprised how many people think this sort of rot is good science fiction. Thank goodness the SyFy channel no longer claims to be science fiction oriented.

KJ March 13, 2011 at 2:25 pm

I agree with everyone else here. Why Syfy keeps coming up with such bad movies I’ll never know? Here is a better question, why do I keep watching thinking they will get better? I can’t think of one movie from them over the last two years that I haven’t had a feeling that I have just wasted two hours! I can think of some good TV shows that I wish they had kept up funding like SGA or SGU but they really need stop making movies?

Bruce Simmons March 13, 2011 at 5:07 pm

KJ: LOL… yes, approximately 2 million people a weekend watch the movies. Some aren’t that bad. They really aren’t. No, they’re not Oscar contenders, but we know what we’re getting into… fun popcorn flicks that are better than what’s on TV Saturday nights.

Yet this project was a serious step backward in what seemed to be the developing creative flow of these movies.

Gang, thanks for coming by and chiming in! Appreciate the participation!

OV March 14, 2011 at 1:21 am

Syfy, may I suggest instead of coming out with those poorly executed “Original movies” every month, try working on making just one or two quality movies a year. Come up with a decent script, but some money into the special effects and give your viewers something to look forward to. Your last attempt was atrocious, I will rather watch one of those end of broadcast test patterns from way back in the seventies for two hours than sit through another unoriginal movie.

Les March 14, 2011 at 10:36 am

Watched last night, – now I know what Schizophrenia is.

RP March 15, 2011 at 10:31 pm

Cringingly bad; from the incredibly cheesy special effects, to the lame production, to the worse-than-soap-opera-acting. An embarassment of an attempt at a movie. However, it made me chuckle throughout as I couldn’t believe how bad it was. Could be a classic

jeff March 16, 2011 at 1:47 am

wow. This was beyond bad. I have to seriously question that 2 million people watched this piece of garbage (I gave up after the corsair landed). They would have been better off to have done this as a cartoon as opposed to the effects used (I refuse to call this crap special effects).

Brian March 21, 2011 at 6:53 pm

This was the worst piece of crap ever. Syfy never should have attempted to make this film.

Mike April 1, 2011 at 9:29 pm

Vacuum tubes… really? a tube with no air powers truck, guns, and air ships? what were they trying to pull? and did anyone notice the part where they were in a truck and they shot an alien weapon at some spaceships? How could someone not notice that it was the nerf gun with the drum magazine

Steve April 22, 2011 at 7:10 pm

Did anyone notice that the white car they pushed earlier in the movie was also destroyed again later in the movie. You know your budget is low when you have to destroy the same crappy car twice.

Bruce Simmons April 23, 2011 at 9:01 am

LMAO… good point Steve… and why I didn’t notice that, I don’t know.

tacosean May 12, 2011 at 4:59 pm

Just watched it on netflix Wii because thought it was the other movie. I thought “this isn’t even good enough to be the worst SyFy movie ever.” I had to Google it while still watching, sorry SyFy, I guess it is.

Konrad May 20, 2011 at 5:16 pm

This was like a production of the mighty morphin power rangers, but with a lower budget, worse script, even worse acting and special effects. The only reason that I watched it was to see if I could!

Bruce Simmons May 20, 2011 at 5:27 pm

LMAO… Konrad, that is one of the best reasons I’ve ever seen for watching one of these Syfy knockoffs. Kudos!

CJ January 19, 2012 at 12:14 pm

LOL. I very seldom agree with movie crititics. However, I agree with this review 100%. I am a fan of the SciFi Channel. However, this knockoff movie was such a dispointment, that I stop watching the ScFi Channel for a while. I have seen a lot of B Movies in my life time. However, this movie could not hold a candle to any of the B movies that I have seen in the past.

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