Syfy’s ‘Piranhaconda’ TV Review

by on June 16, 2012

in Entertainment, tv reviews

'Piranhaconda' TV movie review; promo artThe latest hybrid creature feature from Syfy, Piranhaconda, features as hapless victims who battle a monstrous anaconda/piranha hybrid in the Amazon looking jungle in Hawaii. I think, It stars Michael Madsen, Rachel Hunter, Shandi Finnessey and more in this bikini-peppered TV movie extravaganza.

And yes, it is definitely a busty-filled movie so that no matter how far fetched the plot may get, there is always a form of entertainment abound! (The promo art says it all! So to speak!)

Be warned, this is classic Syfy Saturday night original fare.

Piranhaconda starts out with some catchy 60’s beach-like movie theme song (A Roger Corman trademark these days), written specifically for the movie. Prof. Lovegrove (Madsen) is in-transit in a helicopter to an island. He’s escorting two folks deep into the jungle. The Prof. warns them to stay on their toes. The woman asks what’s wrong. (My wife chimed in, “Your acting honey.”)

Lovegrove collects an extremely large egg and while doing that, his comrades are chomped in half by the Piranhaconda, leaving a red mist of blood in the air. It then destroys the helicopter in a single bite. Lovegrove sighs in defeat.

We switch to watching a movie crew filming a slasher film and after they take a break, a film assistant (with an overly abundant chest hanging out of her low cut V tee) is the next victim, being turned into another misty cloud of red. And another. This guy (or gal) snake is hungry.

There’s some “character development” between the cast of the movie, and then watch Madsen get kidnapped by some evil people. They’re all dressed in black… Egads, Rachel Hunter is one of the kidnappers.

'Piranhaconda' TV movie review

We watch three more busty girls deep in the jungle searching for a flower and yep, you guessed it! Bitten into a big red mist.

Supposedly the film crew starts filming at 5am, but the sun is directly overhead. (Movie Oops) But then the movie loses it’s budget and its called off… after that, another of the busty crew gets misted to red.

Hair raising experience watching Syfy's 'Piranhaconda'

Hair raising experience watching Syfy's 'Piranhaconda'

So forth and what not… we go between some development and another misting. Story, misting. Repeat. It’s classic for Syfy… nothing too great but it wasn’t their worse.

In fact, if you enjoy tank tops, busty cast and a lot of it, then you will enjoy “watching” this TV movie. Roger Corman knows how to keep you interested. I’ll give him that!

Best lines from the movie?

Bad guy dressed in black: “It is an unholy union between a Piranha and Anaconda.”

Bad girl (Hunter) in black: “You mean a Piranhaconda.”

Boss bad guy dressed in black: “I can’t believe you just said that.”

Many fans were probably laughing and saying that. And then there’s…

Girl: “Be careful Jack!”

Jack: “It’s what I do, I’m a stuntman!”

Though I have to say, if you’re a Michael Madsen fan, you might want to not hold your breath. He barely mails in his performance to Piranhaconda. But hey, welcome to Syfy!

Everyone’s a critic. My other cat likes a different kind of movie I guess:

'Piranhaconda' was a snoozer for this

{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }

Pseudonym June 20, 2012 at 2:36 pm

You’re very welcome. 🙂

Err, rereading this, I realize I’ve made an error. I hate when my fingers omit a word that my brain tells them to type… “Than that thing”. 😛

Bruce Simmons June 20, 2012 at 2:30 pm

LMAO…. OK, that brightened my day! Thanks Pseudonym!

Pseudonym June 20, 2012 at 2:16 pm

Honestly, your cats look more intimidating than thing. :]

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